Category: confidence

confidence, Identity, lifestyle, motivation, Self development, Well-being

So many roles, but who am I,what makes me, Me? …

brainbiscuitscoaching

So many identities, titles, roles, but who are you?

Struggling with identity? working out who you are? with the time you have left in the day, to yourself, no reserve left to invest in yourself after all you have given to others in the day?

Now more than ever we have all taken on more, play more roles to those in our lives and give all we can to get through what has been a very unusual 12 months! From working from home more, home schooling, becoming teachers overnight, being a rock of support for your household, family, friends and community. But you must not forget you amongst all the chaos.

Then it’s time to plan and workout how to make sure you have some energy, time and plan for you to re-identify yourself back to being you. Start planning the “Get your identity back plan”

First let’s help you to re-identify with yourself;

1, what do you like right now in your life, what do you enjoy?

2, what do you want to change, or not like in your life right now?

3, when do you feel at your happiest and when do you feel at your worst?

Once you have answered these, look at how you answered the question regarding what do you like and when feel at your most happiest. At those times;what are you doing, what role would you label yourself as at that time ?

An example might be, when I am with my children and family at the weekend, that would be your parent label. When I am going for my daily walk with the dog that is probably your ‘you’ label.

When you then look at what you don’t like right now in your life and what makes you feel at your worst. Think about,what labels they best identified with. A example might be; I feel so on edge and stressed and under pressure when at work, so this label would be your ‘profession or job title”.

Once you have the good,the bad,the best and worse times listed and roles labelled ask yourself;

If you could pick anything to describe yourself as, what 3 things at the moment would you want and choose to be?

Which of the 3 descriptions is the most important one to you right now?

Then focusing on that particular one of the 3 first.

Ask yourself, is this something you feel you already identify as? If not what would you need to do to be like this description?

For example if you put happy, you need to think of all the things that would mean and make you happy in your opinion.

It could be things like, feeling very comfortable in my own skin, reaching my your aims in life, seeing the things you want to see and experience in life, having self love and inner contentment for yourself, having good well-being. These are all examples, once you have done this, then do this with the remaining two words left of your 3.

Once you have a description and meanings for all of them, look at what your first wrote down, the answers to what you feel makes you happy, feel at your best and at your worst etc.

Then next imagine or actually form a visual timetable of your life and a snap shot of a full 7 day week. What do you now want it to look like? What can you change to your Current weekly situation, and make a schedule that fits more to the description of who you want to be and what would be a happier lifestyle allowing time factored in so you can be and best version of you as-well as all the other roles you are in the day.

Photo by Pete Johnson on Pexels.com

For example, daily you might be taking on the role of a teacher with homeschooling, parent role and then partner with house work and cooking dinner, sorting household paperwork and needs, but then this time table now has the “you “ factor in.

One where, you have a space and time written in, that you have an hour or what you need of me time, to focus and complete x,y,z towards being the you that you described in the task before, where you picked your 3 words.

It might be that being happy or healthier was a description, therefore you may have concluded you want to become a runner, a Gym bunny, a cyclist, walking rambler, CrossFit member or someone who is very active in life. So you now put this time in to your day and week so you start to become just that.

Before you know it, days become weeks, weeks become months, a year and before long you have made it a lifestyle!

you have become the description, the ‘you wanted to be!

you have your own identity you wanted, away from all the other roles you play to others and can be all of those things in balance with your own needs, wishes, wants and life.

Don’t lose who you are, don’t get lost in your roles, know who you are, what you want and keep being you!

the happier you are the more positive and good you will bring to your life and all those around you. Over time the descriptions can change and your likes and dislikes too, remember every time you do something that makes you happy or more like the description you want to be, in those moments your not just wanting it anymore your becoming that person! Your making it happen your the “you” you want to be,in those moments and you matter!

confidence, Identity, lifestyle, new year, new year resolution 2019, New you, Self development, Steps to success

Build yourself up, don’t knock yourself down!

brainbiscuitscoaching

 

photography of person on green mountain
Photo by mirsad mujanovic on Pexels.com

It’s so easy to think negatively at times about yourself and put yourself down, but have you ever tried it the other way round, thinking positively about yourself instead?

Think of all the times you got back up when life knocked you down, each time you said enough and made a change in your life all the fight you have had in you and determination.

Look at your character, you will be full of personality, skills, attributes and ability in many fields to succeed; some you might not have had the chance to unlock till now, but believe me we each have a wonderful positive contribution to give to both ourselves and others.

So go ahead start your list, ask yourself;

1,what our your personal strengths and list them;

2, list all of the things your happy with about you and your life right now;

3, Find a positive word that you feel best sums you up ! Us this as a tool to help you keep going when you have a challenging day especially when you feel like giving up;

4, Become strong in who you are, remember the inside is just as important as the outside. Make yourself solid to the core in your values, visions and future. Don’t let anyone or anything take that from you, stay true to who you are and allow yourself to grow, progress and most of all enjoy your life!

Happy “You Year”

accountability, confidence, Excersie, fitness, health, Identity, life coaching, goal setting, lifestyle, Mental health, mentalhealth, Well-being

Believe in yourself because you can….

brainbiscuitscoaching

Ever thought if we spent more time on the positive rather than as much time as we do talking negatively about, ourself, putting our self’s down and as a result missing out of things, as a result of all this, what you could actually achieve and be doing with your life?

When if we actually believed we can, how much happier we would be and what we would already have achieved and succeeded at and where we would be?

How many opportunities have come your way that your confidence, limiting self-beliefs, fears and influence of others stopped you taking?

Make a positive change and Stop this happening again! to you and yourself and don’t miss out on any more things you want to do in your life!

Go for it! say yes not No to positive opportunities and the worse thing that can happen is that you tried and it didn’t work or wasn’t what you wanted and then at least there is never going to be any regrets, you tried.

And just What if it all worked and you actually got want you wanted, it would be worth it then.

Take and apply these simple steps right now to your life!….

1) signing up to things! That course, that challenge that task, lessons, new ventures etc, get it’s done sign up!

2) saying yes more often! Those things you want to say yes to but fear stopped you pick one to start with and change the no I can’t to yes I can!

3) drop out more of the things you don’t want to spend your time and energy on! It’s so true the old saying, if you’ve always do what you’ve always done you’ll always get what you’ve always got, time for change, if something is not working change the approach, or draw a line under it and move on!

4) keep the path true to you and go get your dreams. Make sure you’re doing more of what you really want to do it’s your life.

5) make sure all of the above leads you to something that makes you feel really happy regularly.

confidence, health, Identity, lifestyle, Mental health, motivation, Uncategorized

Don’t compare yourself to others, compare your progress of change against yourself….

brainbiscuitscoaching

Personal progress starts from within remember the steps you took and where you once started. revisit the start in your mind how you felt and what your mind set was like and then use this for motivation, with comparison to where you are at present and more importantly where your heading and imagine how you will think and feel in your future when your goal is achieved, mentally, physically and emotionally.

It’s great to gather motivation for your journey but try not to compare yourself to others along the way if you can help it! don’t get me wrong It’s wonderful to have people who inspire us but when it comes to inspiration, take a lot from where you once where and don’t forget each positive change and step you have taken. Be your own measure-able motivation. Only you no the efforts it took to get you where you are today! These steps are so worthy of being phrased.

Just take a moment and ask yourself, when did you last celebrated for a minute your personal progresses, look at what you have achieved and not what you haven’t! I encourage you to keep records of your own start point and progress line and look back at the differences along the way. Look at what makes you feel and think the best you can about who you are and all you have become. These would motivate you to Become the version of yourself you want to be; what dose that even mean you ask?

Only you know what you want and who you want to be and have in your life, but I would imagine for most of us we would have on our list something that represents finding true happiness at the top of this.

So look at your present self, past self and what you want in your life with your future self.

It helps to become more accepting of yourself and make changes to what you don’t like or don’t want to accept and look at ways of working with the bits you want to change and plan your goals and the steps that will lead you to get results.

For the things we can’t change, review the way your mind set is towards them. Its so self rewarding to learn to draw a line! It’s important to learn to move forward with accepting this that your drawing a line and then let go of what you are not in control of and can’t change and finally be free of those holding you back.

I find it helpful to log all of your steps you have made, try a simple yet affective exercise.

1)Firstly find a quiet spot

2) take a price of paper and write down what you are in control of .

3)write wha you can’t control.

4) in the middle draw a happy bubble in the middle and fill it with a list of all the things that you love, enjoy and makes you smile.

5)pick a item off your list that you have in your can control column and make a start planing your steps towards that becoming a reality.

This chart example is where you list the things you can control, can’t control and then what’s your happy place your centre . Good for anxiety, personal goal setting,

Then every time you feel you need to re-evaluate you can use this exercise tool to help get things out and down on paper.

If you find yourself comparing things in life compare your journey, from where you have been, where you are now and where you are heading.Be in competition with no one just yourself!