It’s so easy to think negatively at times about yourself and put yourself down, but have you ever tried it the other way round, thinking positively about yourself instead?
Think of all the times you got back up when life knocked you down, each time you said enough and made a change in your life all the fight you have had in you and determination.
Look at your character, you will be full of personality, skills, attributes and ability in many fields to succeed; some you might not have had the chance to unlock till now, but believe me we each have a wonderful positive contribution to give to both ourselves and others.
So go ahead start your list, ask yourself;
1,what our your personal strengths and list them;
2, list all of the things your happy with about you and your life right now;
3, Find a positive word that you feel best sums you up ! Us this as a tool to help you keep going when you have a challenging day especially when you feel like giving up;
4, Become strong in who you are, remember the inside is just as important as the outside. Make yourself solid to the core in your values, visions and future. Don’t let anyone or anything take that from you, stay true to who you are and allow yourself to grow, progress and most of all enjoy your life!
Mental health awareness week has fallen at a time where many of us are in a form of lockdown or just starting to come out of it!
This is a time where we all will feel a change in our mental health, wether we are fully aware of it or not. It’s a time to be kind to ourselves and listen to our needs especially if we feel we need support, space or some me time.
We all have mental health just as we have physical health however, it is not always something we look at regularly supporting and training, or exercising and reviewing. It would be wonderful to think we soon will be in a world where we could openly ask each other ” how you feeling today and how’s your mind”, without it being uncomfortable.
We all have those moments in life where things can cause us to feel lower in our mood. This often affects our mental health. Times of this “low mood “ or any ongoing sadness can happen to any of us at any time, feeling as if it comes upon us without any warning. It is important to recognise your own personal triggers. It’s important to ask yourself
1,what are my triggers?
2,What sends my stress levels over the edge?
3, Is there any changes you can make to help you manage these things?
4, what helps you to keep going when you feel like this?
The triggers could be anything, such as a memorable date, topics you are sensitive to and don’t want to face yet, family, relationships, self-limiting beliefs, traumas, life events, medical reasons, life pressure, public speaking, anything! It is so important to take the time to look at any trigger patterning you have.
By looking at triggers you can possibly unlock a resilience strategy for yourself that just might help you cope better when you are in need.
Emotional stress can be really overwhelming, it can impact both your physical and mental state. Strategies to support your resilience can work wonders in helping you through this time, along with of course any support groups, professional outreach etc available to you.
Examples of resilience you can use when this happens are things such as supportive building blocks to help manage your stress levels. Some of mine are below:
• When life is busy I have to make sure I have me time
• Personal head space-time, walk, read, chill out somewhere away from everything to just clear your mind (a pause moment)
• Something that is physical such as sport; for me my main choice of activity to spend my “me” time on is running
• Something that makes you feel a sense of belonging such as socialising with the right community
• Things I enjoy, things that make me happy, as happiness is so important! Such as hobbies (Creative Diet)
• Try to goal set my activities into my weekly plans, looking at how I can review and improve and identify the priorities I have. These keep me on track and both my physical and mental health are in better shape for it (Muscle Motivation)
• Predict my stress triggers. When I know something is coming up that is likely to cause stress good planning is key. I look at what I can do to manage it as best I can, and what best supports me
• Make sure you tell someone. If I am worried about things or stressed, just saying things out loud to someone can make a huge difference as you then own your true feelings
• Choose to hang out with people on your level. Someone you can text, call, meet and have that support with
• I ensure I take regular pause moments; so important!
• Even when you don’t feel like it connect with the world daily so you don’t become withdrawn.
Remember you are often not alone with these feelings and it is so important to tell someone. Don’t suffer in silence, it will only get worse.
Tips to keep you feeling good mentally and physically when on holiday or annual leave this spring.
1) Routine, If you find routine is what keeps you feeling positive and well then keep up a routine the best way can when on holiday. From your eating times, sleep habits, to your workouts routines. You can always adapt slightly so everyday instead of going for say your morning run, you do a morning alternative exercise or movement but that you get that same output with you physically energy expenditure.
2) Keep your subconscious thinking when it comes to eating and drinking decide what you want to do and don’t want to do! Make sure you don’t just consume and have things to please others, if you don’t want to drink or eat certain foods don’t! If you do then this is also fine because your decisions come from you, not from pleasing others. You no how much work you have put in to get to where you are and how much time and will power that has taken, so your the one who is best to make the decisions not the voice of others.
3) Take mental, physical and well-being breaks from “your normal”allowing you to relax, recover and recenter, when on leave.
4) If going away, Take a note book and pen with you, write down anything that comes to mind when Away from your normal environment. You may find you have a lot of things come to mind and you can jot them down, revisit them when you want if you want! when were In a new environment and especially at a relaxed state of mind, we tend to be able to connect with ourselves more, are inner thoughts and feelings and have time to actually hear them.
5) Make sure you do things that bring you joy, make you laugh and Have fun! Capture and make memories, to keep your happiness topped up after the break finishes, these things will boost you when you return to normal. The memories will be great to look back on after and motivate you to have more time with the right people, doing things you love and make you happy!
6) Give yourself a moment away from everyone and every thing just to have a quick check in with yourself and recenter. You can check how your feeling especially if you are someone who has anxieties for example when having any changes such as a long drive or travel to somewhere new. Just a moment to be clam and collect your thoughts.
7) Take the opportunity to use your time doing things you enjoy and maybe something new to! take that new book, a craft project, that new workout routine, that recipe you have wanted to try. Doing something creative promotes positivity because there are normally visible results then and there. So you have a feeling and sense of achievement.
8) Try to alter your sleep habits where you maybe get a bit more if you are normally a bit sleep deprived when in your normal routine, top up some that you have missed if can. Feeling rested and revived will always be rewarding.
9) Fresh air and walk’s, try to add them in regularly when off, they are so good for the mind and getting your steps in for the day.
10) Plan some things you would like to get done this holiday, things that you feel will make a difference to your life, home etc from a declutter, painting, fixing or finishing things in your home that are bothering you. This will always make you feel good having that thing finished.
11) Exercise and movement, keep this up this will keep you upbeat and releasing the Endorphins you need, it will keep your mind set well for the holidays.
12)Enjoy yourself! Do what you want when you want how you want, make the holiday yours.
Ever think your plodding along waiting to actually be the real you and live your life the way you want. Become and being who you truly are and want to be?
Do you feel like you start with good intentions to do just this and then Life throws things your way ! Then you have to deal with what’s thrown at you and sometimes it feel constant, so you need time to process the impact of this and what’s been caused as a result.
When these things happen to get through We sometimes have to sacrifice what we wanted, stop and ease all pressure and our personal priorities have to change, shift and our direction then,some times even if temporary has to change.
Then Once the impact of what’s been trown your way becomes the new normal, is resolved, is accepted or has past we can then revaluate where we are and want to go next with our own personal journey again. Back on track or new track. But how do we ensure we can get to where we want to be even with the rollacoaster of life, how can we still become who we want to be and keep creating a lifestyle we want and not keep losing it?
Some ideas of the Steps you could consider and take to help you understand more about who you are, what you want in life and the key to unlocking your true self ….
1) First off it’s important to find out what makes you happy!; Think of all the things that you currently do that makes you feel good, make you feel like your really living and alive, things that make you feel that’s zest again for life. Factor them into your life more and often.
2) No what triggers off your mood swings or various behaviours. It’s a good ideas to keep a mood diary to spot any tiggers both good and bad in your life and day to day, so you can workout what causes these and have more or less time and energy on these things!what ever your mood, sad, angry, worried, scared, happy, excited, motivated etc the list goes on work out what makes you feel what, then un-pick it all from your diary to help you get a clear picture of what you can change if possible.
3) Ask yourself what do I want in my life? What do you want to become in life now? To help you with this there is an exercise you can do, imagine what your ideal self would be like in description if could meet your future self say in 3-5yrs time. what would you want this person to be like and do and have ? Then describe this version of yourself , what words and description have you used. Use this as a basis for current aims and goal setting.
4) To move forward you have to let go of what holds you back. Consider what at the moment dose this?what are you thinking and believing that could limit you, stop you from moving on? Think about areas of yourself and life which you feel make you feel more negative about who you are. Think about what can be done to get rid of these feelings? As limiting beliefs. How can you support yourself to move forward with this so you feel less negative, held back or so fearful.
5) Understand the importance of Self worth, acceptance and belief. How can you help yourself accept yourself more and the things you don’t want to accept make changes to, so they become what you will or want to accept. It’s important to learn how to understand what you can change via what you cannot. Learn to draw a line under those things so you can be free of such negativity and anything toxic and move on finally in your life, most importantly then be free of those things you once harboured inside, creating more space to fill with new positive things form moving forward in your life and all the good these new steps bring.
6) Think about what makes feel the real best version of you! What do you like ?what makes you feel confident, what is it you do that makes you feel happy, your most content and what do you enjoy, what can be added to your day to day life to keep you on track, what do you use to boost yourself. Then consider how often you move outside the comfort zone and take on new ventures, challenges and tasks? Do you currently and rarely do this? If so then maybe think about what would challenge you the right amount to inject some newness into your life? That’s if you want of course. This often can be the smallest step at first but it becomes a seed of change for you, because every step leads to something new, a shift, the start of a new direction in your life. The hardest part is taking the step in the first place.
7) Remember perfect doesn’t exists strive for your best but not prefect, giving things your best will definitely do! keep things real and sustainable no failing their, you can also build a lifestyle off things that are sustainable, allowing you to keep to a level you want to be at which is achievable and maintainable.
8) Learn to say no more and not spend lots of time on things and people that you feel impact your mental health, limit things that make you feel faraway from who you are and drain you, life’s to short.
9) Know yourself , recognise when your slipping and what strategies work to keep you as grounded and stable both mentally and physically as possible, top this up daily and regularly it’s so important.
9) Accept that good things take time, allow yourself time to process what’s happened in your life, no that you will move forward again when the times right when any trauma occurs, no that it’s perfectly normal to need time to repair, grieve, process any trauma, in life and be kind to yourself and reach out if you feel your struggling. Find a community you feel part of to work through and support each other, connect and in turn this could help you to feel less alone and isolated.
10) Don’t deflate and dim down who you are to please others, life’s to short so shine, find others who allow you to shine and radiate off each other and have a tribe who is definitely your vibe around you.
11) Remember your human and we all have bad days, sad days low days your not a robot,you will experience different emotions in life and that perfectly ok!
12) Be aware that Your mental health will change rapidly at times in life, when unexpected things happen. workout what helps you feel stable and use these strategies regularly to keep yourself topped up.
13) Value your health make a small step then another, keep adding one you commit to one for long enough it becomes a lifestyle. Changes that are realistic and sustainable allowing you to constantly improve your overall lifestyle.
14) understand the importance of Self-care, value how important this is, do things that support you and promote your well-being and no how this can be affected on good days and bad days and factor in time for you to look after yourself and needs.
15) No what you need and how to make it happen for yourself. This isn’t a selfish act! it’s key to success “you time” is key for your mental health, physically health and well being it’s what supports your success and happiness.
Remember You hold the key to “you” now you just need to know how to turn it ….
Happiness is the feeling of contentment and feeling of pleasure. so make sure you seek out happiness for yourself as-well as others in your life, it’s important for you to also to be happy!
Ask yourself what makes me happy! What do you enjoy? what brings you pleasure and a feeling of contentment…..
H) Having true belief, grounding and strength in who you are as a person. Finding happiness and acceptance in your own skin.
A) Awareness of what’s good for you and what’s not in life, being able to keep anything toxic away from your life as much as possible. Surrounding yourself with people that boost you and you can radiate off in return.
P) Pleasure, doing the things you love and enjoy regularly!
P) Perfectly aware that perfect dosent exists so you don’t put pressure that’s not needed on yourself just accountability and drive to go get what’s important to you and do the best you can and make goals that’s realistic and sustainable.
I) Identity, you know who you are what your about where your going and want from your life, even if this changes you feel you have your identity.
N) new, ventures, experiences, aims, challenges, learning and growth is something you embark on regularly.
E) Encourage, you to are positive, happy and encouraging to others and them to you who you decide to spend and give your time to, your tribe is your vibe you build and lift each other up in life
S) Sustainable, what you do is realistic and achievable and can continue and grow in your everyday life so your life style is where you want it to be, you make goals, steps and choices in life you can sustain.
S) Smile, find your Smile, constantly work on making sure you spend time on things that make you smile, from people you hang out with, tasks and projects you do, you no the importance of laughter and a true smile appearing on your face.
A practical exercise you can do to ensure you keep bringing out your Happiness is, Make a list of what you feel dose just this!what makes you happy?
Identify What on the list is currently in your life, how regularly and what on the list currently isn’t in your life yet!
Then pick 2 of the things you have listed that you want to bring into your life more and regular routine. So you can keep your happiness growing and develop on having a lifestyle you love and enjoy!
Then next is to plan some steps for making these things happen. Start with the two you have picked from you list. How can you fit them in, add them in and enjoy them daily, weekly, monthly etc. Then keep all the things you feel make you happy under review as it can change, so goals can be made, moved and continue to be inspired and motivational for you.
Tips to keep your mindset happy;
1) Let go of things you don’t need to hold on to, draw a line and invest your time and energy wisely and on things that bring you positively back. You can’t change the past but tomorrow’s yours for the taking.
2) Be as healthy as you can, sleep well, eat week, move regularly.
3) Make things in your life work for you, take a moment to plan the best way to balance everything right for you and the best way so your not feeling like your struggling and juggling constantly.
4) Regular have a declutter, clean up and review things, from your goals and steps, get rid of things you don’t need or don’t get used. Clean space clear mind
5) Make sure you laugh often, surrounded yourself with things that bring out your sense of humour, laughter goes a long way.
6) Make time to be creative any way you can from building things to baking, arts, music, crafts and gardening whatever you class as creative for you.
7) Get regular fresh air and walks they are great for processing, clearing the mind, helping you gain prospectus by removing yourself from the same environment all the time.
8) Spend time with people who make you feel yourself and enjoy making memories with those you love.
9) Prioritise your mental health like you would your physical, your mind matters do all you can to support yourself.
10) do things that make you feel liberated, free and stress free.
Sleep is so important it is an essential function for our body so it can recharge and this is equally as important for our mind also. Sleep is how we restore and is vital for a healthy mind, body and of course our spirit, know one’s their best self when they are sleep deprived!
Tips to help you prepare and unwind for sleep;
1) Have a brain dump before bed. Try to wind down by getting all the things swimming by around in your head out, do a subconscious Brian dump right a list tor tomorrow so that’s not something else to worry or lay awake about stressing.
2) Unwind by Taking a nice warm bath with your favourite aromatherapy bath products or salts etc, light a candle and make yourself a mini me spa time.
3) Consider avoiding to much screen time light from devices such as phones and I-pads etc near the time you want to sleep and Cut down the amount of screen time at night and before bed a few hours before if possible.
4)Try Listen to relaxing sounds, songs, music, stories, positive things to aid sleep when ready to sleep.
5)Try Read a book or something that helps you relax and unwind.
6) Make your bedroom as realxing and sleep aiding as possible, nice colour scheme which is clam for the mind, bedding that’s fresh, soft and cosy, keep it decluttered, clam and welcoming when it comes to sleep.
7) Think about lightning, soft fabrics, scents etc in your sleep environment, all which help promote and aid a good night sleep. Get rid of lights and sounds that bother you. Blackout when can any curtain gaps unless you want to wake when the sun comes up.
8) Consider scents that are known for promoting good sleep, lavender is meant to be proven to promote support with insomnia as a natural alternative, add this to your routine, bath, room etc
9)When it comes to your actual Sleep routine timeframes, try to set a typical sleep pattern of time you go to bed and time you wake up, this helps the brain program a bespoke body clock for you over time. Most of us need 6 plus hours a night 8-9 at best so try to aim for this.
10) stretch and relax, find something you enjoy to rebalance and recenter from your busy day, from light yoga, Pilates or meditation or simple stretching