Everyone goes through things in life everyone has a past, some good some bad and you can use these past experiences to channel anything from it that you want. Things that you learnt, things that were positive and helped you grow, grow into who you are today and helped build your resilience for life. But please remember the past doesn’t have to define you, unless you want it too! It’s the past for a reason don’t let it write your future, you be the narrator! Things might be tough and get hard at times but you can still change tomorrow, you can make it better even if just a small step in the direction you want, this step no matter how small is then the starting point of you taking control and not letting anything or anyone hold you back, back from being you!
You can spend the rest of your life blaming the past for how you are now and why things are how they are or you can give yourself an opportunity and see that it’s not to late !to make a new future and change your current story, write a new exciting chapter one that you want, that you choose and finally enjoy and own your life.
It’s not that we should forget what’s happened but it’s knowing that what happened is past tense and doesn’t mean things can’t change and be better,live and work towards a future, your future.
Don’t be scared to live a life that when you look back you can say whatever life chucked your way you did all you could to have the life you wanted, regret free!
If the past experiences you have been through still eat you up and affect you negatively or physically then be honest with yourself, find and get support this will help you to address the things that keep bothering you so that you then can move forward once and for all. I know it’s hard but don’t be frightened it will be the best thing for your future addressing what is holding it back!
We all have times where we feel like giving up on things, the targets we set, the plans we make the goals we have because at times everything is hard and can be such a effort! It can feel like every part of you is tired and everything seems well, hopeless and empty. So what do you do to keep going and not give up?
We all experience days like this or will do at some point in our life and it’s good to know how to help yourself through this and what you can do if you find yourself in this position.
1) Stay connected, tell someone your not having a good day! however you communicate that just make sure you let them know. Take a moment also to think about who that would be so that if you ever find your day to be a struggle you’ll no that when in the middle of feeling like this who that person is you would call.
2) Think about What normally helps lift and lighten the mood.what makes you feel better? Try to do it, exercise, crafts, sleep, music, art, cleaning,Baking? Whatever it is try to do it, use it as “your go to! ”
3) Leave the house! don’t shut away from everyone, even if it’s a short walk, drive or full on run you chose leave the house ! environment change can really help and keeps you connected to the world.
4) It’s also still that time of year where many of us struggle because it’s cold, dark and the sun isn’t always out, so the days can seem very long and dark! When there is daylight and reasonable weather it’s a great idea to go outside!
5) When your struggling also remebr to give yourself acknowledge for the things you have done and are doing, remember where you started and where you are now, that you have the strength to get back up! believing in yourself and that you can get through this!
6) It’s so important to be kind to yourself and prep talk yourself through this day! Whatever you take comfort from do!
7) Laughter is a great way to lift spirts try watching something you like that you find funny.
8) Plan things to look forward to doing in the near future, Watch, read, listen to things that inspire you. This can help you to look forward. “Maybe look at a holiday”?
9) Also functioning properly is so important, Sleep how are you sleeping ? This is so important and it could be that your also very tired and exhausted and could be experiencing burn out! So try to rest and look to get a good sleep,
10) it’s important to also see if there are any trends that you notice which cause you to feel this way, there might not be but if there are it’s worth going into that in more detail and working out why and what can be done to change this in the future. Do you need support there is nothing wrong in asking for help!
Please also be aware your not alone we all have down days if they turn into longer periods of time and more often definitely speak to someone don’t suffer alone!
With autumn well and truly here, it’s a season full of change and I use it as a season to prep for the winter and enjoy all the wonderful inspiration autumn has to offer. It’s a great time to declutter, forget spring cleaning enjoy “Autumn Organising”.
This time of year, I like to make changes to my living environment as I know over the coming weeks I will spend more time indoors as winter approaches. I like to change items in my living space as it creates a new mood and therefore a new energy in my home. My living room is the heart of my home so I always focus on this space and of course my bedroom. Things I aim for is looking at soft lighting as this keeps me feeling positive in the darker days as unfortunately unlike summer there isn’t long amounts of natural light so this is important to me and of course colour, I tend to change colours in my home once for spring/summer and then autumn/winter, choosing colours you are drawn to is so important. Right now, I am drawn to a cosy soft grey and warm autumn pink. For my living space. I like to change my throws, cushions, flowers and try to minimise things ahead of Christmas. This also could be items you can change, update, up-cycle or find on-line with little to no cost.
Autumn for me can affect my mood I notice now that I start off feeling a little flat when October approaches. However interestingly, Autumn tends to be a great season for me personally to focus. Autumn for me has a pattern I notice where anything I set out todo goal setting wise works. It’s important to work out if you have a season which you are at your best! Make a mental log of what season works best for you, this would be a great tool and should be used when planning something that needs lot of focus and motivation, as this is when you’re at your optimum peak of positive mindset!
My Personal Autumn must dos are;
1, Take a bag and fill it with anything in your house you feel you’re ready to move on from, no-longer wear,use or need. Fill the bag and send it off to your local charity shop!
2, Try a new recipe andmake something hearty to enjoy. I personally love using a slow cooker this time of year for seasonal vegetable stews, soups and dishes.
3, Pick a space in your home such as an area your drawn to and want to change. Try quick go-to changes first for example if it’s the sofa in your living room change the cushions and throw and see if it makes you feel uplifted or any different feeling to the space, more cosy, calm etc. Put up new photos and pictures that inspire the changes and new things going on in life right now, positive Visuals are great!
4, Pick a new scent, try a new perfume for you, a candle for your home, I went with an Autumn scented candle, lots of Sandalwood, Amber and burnt Orange to bring the crisp Autumn feeling in the home!
5, Have a go-to basket for inspiration and when you’re feeling inspired to do something like goal set, list right, plan-things or get creative. Have things in the basket like notebooks, pens, books, craft projects you want to do this season. This positive pod,means they are all conveniently ready for you, prep again is key!
6, With the darker night’s drawing in, I like to review my exercise routine, either get equipped for running in the dark or make routine changesand try some new remember winter creeps up on you so plan your new exercise routine now. Remember with exercise preparation is key!
7, This time of year can get expensive so maybe look at any positive changes that you can make to your shopping and outgoings, sometimes being organised with homemade lunches, prepared meals from scratch not only healthier but cost affective to, these things can really help make a positive spin on the pennies
8, Have list of things you want to go and do this season, step outside the comfort zone and do something that challenges you in a positive way, from classes, to on-line learning, reading that book, visiting new places trying a new hobby or exercise, go for it!
9, Go through your kitchen cupboards/pantry and see what you have that’s in date, but you won’t really use that you could give to your local food bank most super markets now have a trolley at the front you can give items to. You could even get some extra bits to give, I like to get pasta to add to my items I donate.
10, This is one of my favourites, get your diary full of social catch ups with all your friends, it’s so important to keep connected especially with people who make you happy!
11, Something you might want to do is set a goal that can be complete between now and Christmas or winter ask yourself,
Q: By Christmas I would like to (blank)
Fill this answer in with something you would like to achieve in these time frames.
12, I like to go through my clothing and make a capsule wardrobe (collection of a few essential items) and put a few full out fits together that I want to wear and that make me feel positive. It’s fun to sometimes get ideas for AW18 fashion, hair, accessories and makeup for inspirations.
There are always off days for everyone! Days where the end game feels further away than ever, and you lose your motivation and will.
These are the Days where you need to stop and look at all the steps you have taken already to get where you are and appreciate them! remember you will get there as long as you keep going.
On these days be kind to yourself, surround yourself with positive people, surroundings and spaces.
It so important to have a “motivation Muscle you can go see the link below to:
Remember everyone has off days, don’t be hard on yourself, adapt your plans when things seem hard and its ok to have a day where you just take a Pause from it all.
remember you only give up, when you don’t get back up!
We all have mental health just as we have physical health however, it is not always something we look at regularly supporting and training, or exercising and reviewing. It would be wonderful to think we soon will be in a world where we could openly ask each other ” how you feeling today and how’s your mind”, without it being uncomfortable.
We all have those moments in life where things can cause us to feel lower in our mood. This often affects our mental health. Times of this “low mood “ or any ongoing sadness can happen to any of us at any time, feeling as if it comes upon us without any warning. It is important to recognise your own personal triggers. It’s important to ask yourself
1,what are my triggers?
2,What sends my stress levels over the edge?
3, Is there any changes you can make to help you manage these things?
4, what helps you to keep going when you feel like this?
The triggers could be anything, such as a memorable date, topics you are sensitive to and don’t want to face yet, family, relationships, self-limiting beliefs, traumas, life events, medical reasons, life pressure, public speaking, anything!
It is so important to take the time to look at any trigger patterning you have. By looking at triggers you can possibly unlock a resilience strategy for yourself that just might help you cope better when you are in need.
Emotional stress can be really overwhelming, it can impact both your physical and mental state. Strategies to support your resilience can work wonders in helping you through this time, along with of course any support groups, professional outreach etc available to you.
Examples of resilience you can use when this happens are things such as supportive building blocks to help manage your stress levels. Some of mine are below:
When life is busy I have to make sure I have me time
Personal head space-time, walk, read, chill out somewhere away from everything to just clear your mind (a pause moment)
Something that is physical such as sport; for me my main choice of activity to spend my “me” time on is running
Something that makes you feel a sense of belonging such as socialising with the right community
Things I enjoy, things that make me happy, as happiness is so important! Such as hobbies (Creative Diet)
I try to goal set my activities into my weekly plans, looking at how I can review and improve and identify the priorities I have. These keep me on track and both my physical and mental health are in better shape for it (Muscle Motivation)
Predict my stress triggers. When I know something is coming up that is likely to cause stress good planning is key. I look at what I can do to manage it as best I can, and what best supports me
Make sure you tell someone. If I am worried about things or stressed, just saying things out loud to someone can make a huge difference as you then own your true feelings
Choose to hang out with people on your level. Someone you can text, call, meet and have that support with
I ensure I take regular pause moments; so important!
Even when you don’t feel like it connect with the world daily so you don’t become withdrawn.
Remember you are often not alone with these feelings and it is so important to tell someone. Don’t suffer in silence, it will only get worse.
When everything feels a little hopeless….
Brain Biscuits Coaching 